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mollywheezy in fics_by_mkf

Multi-chaptered (WIP): Tonks/Remus

Author: mollywheezy
Title: Inadequate Plumbing
Rating & Warnings: PG-13, none
Word Count: ~3300
Prompt(s): #8 Write a fic/create an artwork with ‘Inadequate Plumbing’ as the title
Summary: With a little help from people who love him, Teddy comes into possession of his mother's diary and gets some questions answered about his parents.
Notes: I actually started this story over a year ago as a gift for sspring92 but hit a snag. Then the prompts at rt_morelove for the Twelfth Day got me over my snag! However, due to Real Life Drama, I was unable to finish the fic for the fest. I want to give credit for the community and the prompt that helped me, and here is the gift that sspring92 has been so patiently awaiting! It originally was going to be a drabble and now is a multi-chaptered fic. Hopefully it was worth the wait!

Ron sneezed. "Why are we down here again, Harry?"

"I told you. I volunteered to go through the files that were damaged by the leak in the pipes."

Ron sighed. "Yeah, you told me that. But you didn't tell me what possessed you to volunteer for such a thing. What in bloody hell were you thinking, anyway?" Ron sneezed again. "Reckon the Ministry could at least have Magical Maintenance dust down here?" Ron shook his head in disgust.

Harry sighed and rubbed a hand through his hair. "Honestly, Ron, I heard the case numbers of the files that were potentially damaged, and I think some of them might be Tonks' old cases. I know it's not much, but Teddy's been asking a lot of questions recently, and maybe. . ." Harry shrugged. "I just didn't want to pass up the possibility. Maybe she'd have old notes that would be declassified by now, and Teddy could at least see her handwriting." Harry shrugged again.

"I got it, mate. I miss Tonks, too. Let's see what's in these moldy boxes."


Back in the office they shared, Ron and Harry opened several boxes and sorted through sopping wet papers, all of which were completely ruined. "What's this?" Harry asked, pulling out a black leather book with scrollwork on the covers. He flipped through the pages, but found nothing in it. "This isn't wet, so it must have protective charms on it."

"Do you think Tonks charmed her Auror notebook so nobody could read it but her?"

"It wouldn't surprise me, but those charms usually break when a person dies." Harry cleared his throat loudly. "And what would be the point of having such strong spells on Auror notes? What's this here?" Harry pointed to part of the embossed design.

"It looks like a tiny hand . . ." Ron took the book from Harry to examine it more closely. "I wonder . . . Do you think this might be Tonks' personal journal? Maybe she enchanted it so only a metamorphmagus could read it?"

Harry took the journal back. "You mean she could morph her finger into a tiny hand to fit in that spot?"

Ron shrugged. "It makes sense."

"Yeah, it does." Harry cast several spells on the book. "There doesn't appear to be anything dark about it. It does seem like something Tonks would do—hiding her personal journal with work files, especially once she and Remus moved in with her mum."

"She may have thought she'd be able to come back and get it later." Ron suggested.

"True," Harry waved his wand over the book numerous times. "Well, I've tried all of the spells I know on it, so we may as well let Teddy try and test your metamorphmagus theory. I suppose it can't hurt."


Alone in his room after returning home from Christmas dinner at the Burrow, Teddy morphed his finger to fit in the spot Harry had shown him and felt a wave of magic. When he opened the journal again, there were words on all of the pages. He was overwhelmed—he had something his mum had written! Against all odds, Ron's crazy idea had been right.

Teddy didn't start reading immediately. He held the journal in his hands in wonder. This had belonged to his mum. The only other known metamorphmagus in recent English history. What if this was really private? Was it OK to read his mum's private thoughts? Would she have let him read it someday if she had lived? He had asked Harry those questions, and been reassured his mum was a very open person, and Harry thought she would have told him whatever he asked. So would his dad, but Teddy couldn't ever really know the answers to those questions.

After a few moments of consideration, Teddy's curiosity and desire to know more about his parents (it was possible his mum had mentioned his dad in here) won out over his hesitancy to invade his parents' privacy.

He opened to the first page of the journal.

15 September 1991

Dear Diary,

Dear Diary? That makes me sound like a complete and utter prat. Mad-Eye said it was good for Aurors to get in the habit of writing down their thoughts, especially since there's so much of our job that's confidential, but "Dear Diary" just doesn't seem like me. I need to think I'm talking to a friend, and a friend would have a name. What about Bob? No, too boring. Maybe I could . . . No. It could potentially get weird if I named my diary after someone I actually know . . . I've got it!

Wotcher, D!

I'm an official Auror! I passed my exams and everything! Nobody's even been accepted into the program in ages, so just getting trained was really something. But I've really done it now. Auror Tonks!

Teddy didn't plan to share the journal with anybody else, but he would at least tell Harry and Ron that it was his mum's journal. After all, he wouldn't have it if not for them.

Teddy skimmed through to see what was there. He wanted to read through every single word . . . eventually. But at the moment, he mostly wanted to know if his mum ever wrote about his dad. It started with her first day on the job as an Auror, and she talked about her first case. This looked pretty boring. Teddy skimmed ahead, looking for his dad's name. Nobody had been able to tell him when his parents started going out, but Gran assumed they had been for a while before they told her about it. That'd be something a woman would write in a journal, wouldn't it? Teddy didn't really know.

He continued skimming. He saw a page with drawings of hearts and stopped. One question was answered—his mum had written about his dad! One large heart with intricate scrollwork doodles proclaimed NT +RL in swirly letters. Another heart stated, "Remus loves Tonks." He paged backwards a bit, and the word "Hogwarts" caught his eye. His dad taught at Hogwarts! Teddy found the beginning of that entry and began to read.

1 November 1993

HOGWARTS,D!!! I get to go back to Hogwarts! The reason isn't great. Cousin Sirius attacked the Fat Lady! Mum thinks, and I agree with her even if I won't admit it to her, Fudge is only sending me to get the report from Professor McGonagall because he wants to make sure I'm on the Ministry's side and not Sirius'. It's true I don't believe Sirius killed all of those people—I think he was framed. And I don't know what in Merlin's name made him attack the Fat Lady, but I will do my job and investigate like the good Auror I am . . .

It didn't really take much investigation. I spoke with the Fat Lady and took her statement, then talked to Professor McGonagall and Headmaster Dumbledore. And that was that. I was on my way out of the castle to go say hello to Professor Sprout and to Hagrid before I left, when the bloody suit of armor tripped me! I swear, that suit of armor has always had it in for me! It was the bane of my existence at Hogwarts, and still is. I took a flying leap forward and crashed into something warm and solid that caught me. I looked up, and it was REMUS LUPIN who had caught me!!! D, I fancied him so badly when I was a child, and Sirius would bring him round. I think I spent years doodling hearts with our names in them. Twelve years has not made him any less fanciable. More actually, since I am not a little girl and acting on the fact that I fancy him may actually be possible.

I was still staring at him, mouth open like a bloody fish, when Remus said, "Are you all right, Auror . . .?"

D, he didn't recognize me! I smiled widely and morphed my hair from brown to pink.

"Dora? Dora Tonks?"

"Wotcher, Remus," I said. "Thanks for catching me. That bloody suit of armor has been after me for years."

Remus chuckled. I made him laugh, D! He set me back on my feet and let go of my arms (unfortunately), but asked, "Would you like to join me for a cup of tea? We could catch up."

"I'd love a cuppa, but we wouldn't have so much to catch up on if you had actually come round any of the times Mum invited you."

Remus blushed! He actually blushed!

Since he didn't say anything, I added, "I won't hold it against you, though. You offered tea?" And I took his arm so he could escort me to his office. "After all, you did just save a damsel in distress from a mad suit of armor." That made him laugh again!

He took me to his office and set the kettle to boil, while telling me about teaching and asking me about being an Auror.

We drank tea and talked for over an hour. I certainly didn't feel like that much time had passed, but then Remus sighed and said he had a student coming in soon. It sounded like he didn't really want me to leave, but I didn't want that to just be my wishful thinking. I thanked him for the tea, and said I had enjoyed talking to him and that we should do it again sometime. He smiled and said, "How about Sunday? I know this out of the way place in Hogsmeade where we could meet for lunch." I was jumping up and down inside, D, but tried to play it as cool as possible as I said I would like that.

I did stop and see Professor Sprout and Hagrid on the way out of the grounds. Funnily enough, Hagrid was visiting Professor Sprout when I stopped by. It was great to catch up with both of them. Professor Sprout told me I should call her Pomona now, and should come round more often. I told her I'd work on it.

Teddy skimmed the next several pages. He wanted to find what happened on Sunday.

7 November 1993

D, the day is finally here, and I can't decide what to wear! I never have problems like this. I had on my Auror robes when Remus saw me last . . . and didn't recognize me. Although since he had last seen me when I was a child, not recognizing me is probably a good thing. And he knew me as soon as I morphed my hair pink . . . I almost always have pink hair when I'm off duty, so pink it is. No point in not being myself. I want Remus to get to know (and love. Ahem) the real me. But for clothing . . . I wish I knew more about the place we're eating lunch. It probably won't be dressy, but my Weird Sisters t-shirt may not be appropriate either. Hmmm . . . let's see. The beauty of magic is enchanting my pen to transcribe what I say while I hunt through my closet for the perfect not-dressy-but-not-too-casual-possibly-a-first-date outfit. When I agreed to meet for lunch, I should have said something like, "It's a date" and then I could have seen how he reacted to the word "date" which would have given me some very useful information.

Teddy wondered if Victoire had agonized so much over their first date. Of course, their first "date" had been to Hogsmeade, and they had always gone together, and he didn't actually ask her to go and call it a date. It was rather unpremeditated; Teddy took her hand while they walked around, she smiled at him, and when they went back to the castle, before they parted, he kissed her. He didn't ask her to be his girlfriend until the next day when he thought that, yeah, maybe he should, so then they were. And still were almost three years later.

I finally settled on some casual blue robes. I've been told they bring out my eyes, and they don't clash with pink hair, so that's a bonus. I left a little bit early to find the café where we were meeting. It was on a side street I hadn't explored before, and a cute little place—not somewhere students would be likely to frequent, also a bonus, especially for Remus. I heard a pop, and when I looked behind me, it was Remus. He looked a bit peaky (I know the full moon was just a couple days ago—I looked it up), but he was smiling. He hugged me as he said hello, and of course I hugged him back! He also told me I looked nice. Success!

Lunch was simple but delicious. We both had soup and sandwiches and tried each other's so we were able to experience more of the wonderful food. We talked about our weeks, I shared funny Auror stories, and Remus told me some funny student stories. We sat in the café talking and laughing until they closed. We hadn't noticed the owners putting all the chairs on the tables and performing cleaning spells. We left giggling, and gave them an extra big tip. We were going to walk around and look at the shops a bit, but it was pouring rain! Remus had to get back to Hogwarts for a student's detention that evening anyway, so he conjured an umbrella and Apparated us to the gates. He invited me to do the same thing again next week, and this time I was prepared and said, "It's a date." And Remus responded, "Yes, another one." He gave me this impish grin that was dead sexy and conjured another umbrella, slipping through the gates and closing them behind him before I could do anything. Like try to kiss him. He gave me a cheery little wave as he began walking across the grounds. Honestly, kissing him in front of the gates of Hogwarts probably would not have been the best idea, but still. Bloody hell. The man is already driving me mental. In the best way possible, of course.

Teddy flipped ahead to the next week. Mum hadn't written much anyway. He found the next time his mum saw his dad.

13 November 1993

We met for lunch at the same place. It was just as wonderful as last week, but since there was a break in the interminable rain, we decided to continue our conversation while wandering around a bit.

As we were walking around Hogsmeade, Remus took my hand! I squeezed his fingers and smiled at him, and we continued exploring. We popped into this little shop that Remus said has fabulous desserts. He was right. Yummmm . . . . We talked to the shop owners for a few minutes, a husband and wife who are really kind and friendly. They have accents, but I don't know what country they are from. As we said our good-byes and turned to leave, Mrs. Shop Owner said, "Ah! Ze mistletoe!" And pointed above our heads. I seriously think she conjured it just at that moment. I'll have to go back and thank her later.

Remus looked down at me and whispered, "I'm game if you are." I nodded and smiled. He kissed me and WOW

I felt happy bubbles building up in my chest that were threatening to burst out. Remus invited me back to Hogwarts for tea, and I said yes, but I really hoped "tea" was code for "snogging".

When we got to the gates of Hogwarts, Remus said, "Do you have your Auror badge with you?"

That was a weird question. I said yes and started to ask why, but before I even had the question out of my mouth, Remus said, "Then hang on!" put his arms around me and Apparated.

We landed in his office!

When I got my breath back I said, "You Apparated into Hogwarts! I thought that was impossible!"

He looked ridiculously pleased with himself and said, "I'm gifted." There was a certain glint in his eye that made me want to find out in what other ways he was gifted, especially those ways that don't involve clothing.

"Seriously. How does that work? Hogwarts, A History says that you can't Apparate into or out of Hogwarts."

"Fine, I'll let you in on the closely held secret. An Auror with a badge may Apparate or Floo into a Professor's office if said professor has altered his or her wards to allow the Auror in. A professor may Apparate into his or her own office after touching the gate. You can't Apparate out, however."

I had to take this all in, but all I could think about was, "You altered the wards to let me in?" That seemed really sweet and I was aware that Remus still had his arms around from when we had Apparated.

"Yes, I changed them immediately after the first time you came here for tea."

That was so adorable, I had to kiss him, and did. And this time we were alone and didn't have to stop . . .

"Teddy?! Would you like to join me for a cup of egg nog?" Andromeda yelled up the stairs to him. Teddy didn't answer for a moment, torn between wanting to keep reading about his parents, and wanting to have egg nog with Gran. She put the alcohol in his now, since he was 17, and had even invited him to have Firewhisky with her.

"Ted? Are you up there?"

"Coming, Gran!" Teddy couldn't resist being treated as an adult by his grandmother. His mum's diary wasn't going anywhere. He'd have all the time in the world to read it. He closed the journal and checked to make sure the words disappeared. He opened his door and called, "I would love some egg nog!"

As Teddy descended the stairs he was in awe; he had such a treasure trove of information about his parents all thanks to Harry, Ron, and some leaky Ministry plumbing.


Aww Thanks! I'll admit it's been so long since I've been on LJ I had trouble navigating and finding it! i will have to remedy that! SO much to love here! The idea of the lock that only a metamorphmagus can open is very clever! I love that Teddy is so desperate for info about his parents that he reads the diary in spite of not wanting to violate Tonks' privacy. I always wanted to believe that R/T got together before OotP, so that they had more time together! Thanks again! I look forward to the next installment, no matter how long it takes! ;)
I'm glad you liked it! I HAD to come up with a plausible explanation for how Remus and Tonks could get together as soon as possible. :)